Imbue

I’m never not looking or waiting for you:

 

Bold crickets serenade the watching moon,

And I think of you.

Gentle breezes lift tiny curls on my crown,

And I feel your understanding touch.

The smell of the first heavy raindrops from a frantic summer storm,

And I taste the charged flavor of you.

 

You dance with all my unseen senses through nature,

And instinctively I open my lungs, my mind, and my heart.

Absorbing the tenderness of my emotion,

Swallowing your sentiment.

I no longer curse the subtle connections,

That tether us, not allowing desuetude of soul.

 

Come to me my love:

In animal song, in playful breeze and in savory rolling thunder.

Breathe into me inspiration.

Evoke and awaken forgotten connection,

Submerge me away with abstract hope ever so gently.

Believe.

The warmth of the sun holds the golden glitter of our hearts,

That innocent children delight and color their worlds in.

 

~m

 

 

Widow

In darken hours

Between madness and witches

I think upon you

My heart cold lonely hitches

 

Those memories before time

Convict my despair

Bringing small comfort

Black mourning I wear

 

Tulle chains my emotion

A silken tomb of embrace

Keeping stoic expression

Full make-up in place

 

If my face breaks cracks

It will leak of bittersweet oil

That ease my rusty hinges

When the bell doth tolls

 

 

~m

 

 

 

Entreat

He spoke my name in whispers,

With a simple blistering kiss.

Etching my soul to yearn,

Reaching our forgotten reminisce.

 

Eloquent of humanity,

Recognition of his blood.

Lip upon lip:

I knew it was him, the one that I loved.

 

Come to me, dream darling

Cross the bridge and awake!

Reunited incarnated souls;

We will save the world from hate.

 

 

~m

 

 

 

 

Dream Leader

Follow my dreams?

No sir, I will not.

They are ‘my’ dreams.

I will lead.

And I will live them how I choose,

Deciding what compass and speed.

You will see me smiling, wind in my hair, with nothing but fires of determination lit in my eyes.

Watch my dreams chase me, and try to keep up!

For they’re mine, and a girl like me, only has her dreams.

Never lose sight of a dreamer like me, I will amaze by magic and show you the impossible.

~m

Moonlight

And the moonlight,  though it spent it’s life hiding in the darkness of the world,  has a resilient soul.

It is the most resilient because it possesses the knowledge of what people do in the dark when no one is looking. It knows truth of people’s hearts, good and evil.

And yet it loves us, despite,  all the same with no discrimination. Deserved or not, it touches us all with its soft glow of understanding and knowing.

 

Nothing is secret from moonlight.

It protects all secrets, magic and mischief.

But moonlight knows.

~m

Acuity

Stained glass, Black Yang.

Rainbow perception, Translated slang.

Yin pigments, Brighten mood.

Looks of confusion, Ideas skewed.

Limited comprehension, Pulls down fools.

Looking up, Primary jewels.

Inside out, Looking reverse.

Normalcy- bleats rehearsed

Life experience, Shapes our lives.

Different steps, To stay alive.

Don’t judge, What you never knew.

Do what we must, Just to get through.

 

 

~m

 

My Reason

Tiny tingles,

At the heart.

Tumbling smooth,

Edges that dart.

Beginnings of smiles,

Owned since birth.

Knowing you,

My reason of mirth.

To be so happy,

Something so plain,

Finding connection

Fusing twain.

Excitement building,

You are the one.

Belief in hope,

Father of the sun.

For years it’s bloomed,

Without you near.

Growing stronger,

My love reveres.

~m

 

Reverse Axis

 

Image result for hug star art                                                                           (unknown artist)

 

 

Stumbling stars

Catch cold

From screams prayed to heaven

Of empty promises

That never are fulfilled

Their lights blur ever so slightly

Eon after eon

Trails of their tears

Collected from observing

Deluding their sky vision

No longer do they see

Vistas now dingy

Overgrown forest of space are

Untended gardens

Of entitlement

Never hearing gratitude

But banal platitudes

Insincere

Hollow

Cynical

 

Stars were born to help,

They were born to guide

But the axis is contrary

Gravity pushes away gifted comfort

And we’ve lost our way

being enveloped in darkness.

 

It inhales our souls.

 

But child, hear me cry:

We must be different!

We must continue to wish

On sad, crying stars

They’ve lost their way

They’ve lost their belief in love.

It is us,

who will comfort them.

We must be their sky.

It is us.

Unconditionally, it is us.

 

~m

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

‘THIS’

I have went back and forth,on even posting this? But the emotional roller-coaster of the past 24 has my head screaming to write.

Yesterday was my birthday.

Yesterday, I found a lump on my breast.

Yesterday, I felt fear.

Am still feeling fear.

I am still feeling fear, and so many other feelings. I don’t even know if they have names for those feelings?

And I started my day so normal. As I would any other weekday, getting ready for work and thinking of plans later for the evening celebrating with my family… And here,  not even 24 hrs later. I realize this fear has changed me.  Already.

Maybe it’s temporary. Maybe it will mark my words with its color forever.

But angrily I resent it.  I hate that it’s making me cry incoherent thoughts by witnessing the sunset, and its rise this morning. Or last night,  seeing smiles exchanged between lovers- oh I despise this lump, it has isolated me to these riotous feelings, and has even had my doctor preparing me for the worst.

24 hours. Actually more like 22.

Irony, right?  That I couldn’t wait 22hrs to be introduced personally to the ‘c’ word? That word- I can’t even type it right now. But its apparent discovery, had to be on my birthday?  Talk about a grand entrance of entrances.

Happy birthday to me, huh?!

I just feel so betrayed-by my body,by the timing of the universe. And there’s not a fucking thing I can I do, could have done, to change it.

Not even my words here can change it.

All I can do is move through my day, a shell of who I was, and await results. And fluctuate between angry sulking, and tearful confusion that ‘THIS’ is actually happening.

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Still thinking**)

If you would claim me,

And call me yours:

Voices would hush,

Demons would snore.

 

I would trust implicitly

I will always be your one

Dismissing the odds,

Dismantling the guns.

 

But being in the place

Of dark in between:

I grow insecure gardens,

Thoughts scatter doubts seed.

 

My feet wobbly

On the side of cliffs

Nails dirt ragged

Joints clinging stiff

 

Strategically warring

Securing foreign lands first

I detonate foundations

From unquenchable thirst

 

Overthinking fantasies

Standard operating procedure

But yet- when I look to my side

You give signs that are eager

 

Hope blooms encouraged

To give it my all

Maybe one day

We will walk after this crawl

 

 

~m